Lisa the Skeptic

"Lisa the Skeptic" is the eighth episode of The Simpsons' ninth season, first aired on November 23, 1997.

Episode details

Production Number: 5F05
Original Air Date: November 23, 1997
Writer: David S. Cohen
Director: Neil Affleck
Blackboard: "I will not tease fatty."
Couch Gag: Three old men in towels use the couch as a sauna, with one of them pouring water into the coals. The family arrives in the room in towels and leave.
Guest Voice: Stephen Jay Gould as himself

Synopsis

As Homer attempts to get a motor boat, a new shopping mall in Springfield is being built on sacred ground. Lisa condemns and protests the building of the mall. Thanks to her protest, it prompts the school to conduct an archaeological dig. When Lisa is digging, it reveals a human skeleton with wings. Springfield's residents are convinced it is an angel, and Homer cashes in by moving the skeleton into the family's garage; however, Lisa is skeptical, believing it may not actually be an angel, and even attempting to have Stephen Jay Gould use it for research.

When the skeleton reappears, it carries a foreboding message that the Apocalypse is coming. All of Springfield's concerned citizens destroy everything science-related due to a restraining order that keeps science and religion 500 yards apart at all times. Sundown approaches, and Springfield's citizens are frightened, but nothing catastrophic occurs. The skeleton is lifted to a new discount shopping mall, saying, "Prepare for the end... the end of high prices!" Lisa finds out that the "end is near" saga was actually a publicity stunt for the mall as a way to exploit the deepest beliefs of people, and calls for a boycott of the mall. However, the bargain-hunting public still go shopping immediately.

Quotes

• Reverend Lovejoy: Well, it appears "science" has faltered once again in the face of overwhelming religious evidence.
  Lisa: But...
  Moe: Go home, science girl!
  Lisa: I am home!
  Moe: Good. Stay there.
• Homer: What the hell are we gonna do with 10,000 angel ash trays?
  Bart: I could take up smoking.
  Homer: You damn well better!
• Homer: (singing a Hallelujah-esque song) Here's the angel! See the angel! It's my angel! No-one else's! Next to the rakes!
• Ralph: Prinscipal Skipple, Prinscipal Skimpster. I found something. (the crowd gathers) It's a spearhead.
  Miss Hoover: That's your trowel blade, Ralph. It fell off the handle.
  Ralph: And I found it.
• Ned Flanders: Science is like a blabber mouth who ruins a movie by telling you how it ends. Well, I say that there are some things we don't wanna know. Important things!