Minor Discworld concepts

This article details minor Discworld concepts: concepts and ideas from the fictional Discworld series by Terry Pratchett which only appear in the background, or are not well fleshed out.

Anti-crime

A rare type of crime, or rather, the opposite of crime. Merely giving someone something, as the opposide of stealing, is not enough, though. An anti-crime, as defined in Reaper Man, must:

...be done in such a way that it causes outrage and/or humiliation to the victim. Merely giving someone something is not enough. Examples of this type include breaking-and-decorating, proffering-with-intent, and whitemailing (for example threatening to reveal a mobster's donations to charity).

Even on the Discworld, or more likely, especially on the Discworld, anti-crime has never really caught on.

Background magic

On the Discworld, where magic has more in common with particle physics than Houdini, background magic is what happens where a very powerful spell hits, creating a myriad of sub-astral particles that severely distract local reality. Building a house, or even walking into a region where this has happened is extremely dangerous.

If you prefer to remain the same species, shape or level of sanity, stay out of these places.

Battle of Koom Valley

A battle between dwarfs and trolls. It is the only known battle in which both sides ambushed the other.

There have actually been several battles in Koom Valley, possibly because it's a naturally suitable location for an ambush, near where dwarf clans and troll tribes are most likely to come into conflict, and possibly because the History Monks stitched the same event into Discworld history on several occasions.

The game of Thud is based on one of these battles.

Cable Street Particulars

According to The Discworld Companion, they started out as an intelligence-gathering organisation, connected to the Ankh-Morpork City Watch. When Lord Winder was Patrician of Ankh-Morpork they became a secret police organisation, noted for torture and holding without charge. This was destroyed during the events of Night Watch.

Recently Commander Sir Samuel Vimes has given the name to the plain clothes division of the restructured Watch, presumably as a dark reminder of why it shouldn't be given too much power.

The Cable Street Particulars are also inspired by (and to some extent, a parody of) the Baker Street Irregulars from the stories of Sherlock Holmes.

Klatchian Coffee

A strong, nearly magical coffee, brewed in Klatch and drunk only by the initiated in very small cups. Not only does it sober you up, it sends you to the other side of sobriety. This state is referred to as knurd, which dispells the soft pink cushions of sobriety and lets you see the world for what it is. In Klatch it is drunk with Orakh (a very violent alcohol made from scorpion venom and cactus sap) to counteract its effects. After a few screams, a lie down and a stiff drink, the occasional drinker will try never to be knurd again.

Klatchian coffee is (presumably) intended as an exaggerated version of Turkish coffee.

Klatch's Coffee was a name of a store in King of the Hill. (To be fair, the reference is more likely to the term "Coffee Klatsch" than the Discworld books.)

Latatian

A variation of Dog Latin. Based on the name, it presumably originates from the Sto Plains town of Sto Lat, although it is often referred to as the "Old Language of Ankh-Morpork".

Pratchett describes it as "very bad doggy Latin." It is most often seen in the mottoes of the noble families, civic organisations and Guilds of Ankh-Morpork.

The classic example is the motto of the Ankh-Mopork Night Watch; "Fabricati Diem, Pvnc". This is complete nonsense in Latin, but looks like it means "Make my Day, Punk" (see Dirty Harry), although Sergeant Colon insists it means "To Protect and Serve".

Latatian is also sometimes used by wizards when casting spells or when faced with a sudden situation; e.g., Rincewind's use of "Stercus, stercus, stercus, moriturus sum" when faced once again with mortal peril in Interesting Times and the motto "Morituri Nolumnus Mori" (translated as "We who are about to die, don't want to" by Lord Vetinari) he wished to have embroidered on the mission badge in The Last Hero.

Necrotelecomnicon

A book (which also features in Good Omens by Pratchett and Neil Gaiman). Its name comes from a mixture of "Necronomicon" and "telecom".

Since the "Necronomicon" is sometimes referred to as "The Book of Dead Names", "Necrotelecommnicon" could be translated as as "The Book of Dead Telephone Numbers" or simply "Phonebook of the Dead". The book is also known as the Liber Paginarum Fulvarum, Latin for "The Book of Yellow Pages".

Written by Achmed the Mad (who apparently preferred to be called Achmed the I Just Get These Headaches), this book lists all the old, dark gods of the Discworld (i.e. the Things from the Dungeon Dimensions). The First Edition, kept in the basement of the Library of Unseen University, has been known to eat readers. It is said that any man who reads more than a few pages will die insane, which works out fine for the Librarian, who is, in fact, an orangutan.

Octarine

The eighth color of the spectrum. Most people have cones and rods in their eyes to help them see, according to the books wizards also have octagons, which allow them to see the color of magic.

To non-wizards, octarine either appears as black or is invisible. It is described as being like a fluorescent greenish-yellow purple. Note that in human colour vision, green is not discernible as green when added to purple; it serves only to desaturate the purple.

Roundworld

Roundworld is the Discworld term for both planet Earth and the "real" universe itself. From a Discworld point of view it exists in a glass sphere at Unseen University, where it is taken care of by Rincewind. It was created by Hex to use up a huge excess of magic. The key point of Roundworld, however, is that it doesn't contain any magic. The wizards are facinated, however, by the fact it does seem to have rules of its own.

Roundworld is the focus of all three Science of Discworld novels.

Scumble

A beverage drunk in very small cups some months apart (or served to strangers in pint mugs, as a sort of initiation test).

"A lot of stories are told about scumble, and how it is made out on the damp marshes, according to ancient recipes passed down rather unsteadily from father to son. It's not true about the rats, or the snakes' heads, or the lead shot. The one about the dead sheep is a complete fabrication. We can lay to rest all the variants of the one about the trouser button. But the one about not letting it come into contact with metal is absolutely true..."

It is a parody of scrumpy and is made with apples. Well, mostly apples. Good scumble apples include the Lancre Blackheart, the Golden Disagreeable and the Green Billet. In Mort it was drunk on the Sto Plains, but in later books it is associated with Lancre, where it is distilled by Nanny Ogg.

Vermine

This small rodent is a more careful variant of the lemming, as it only throws itself off small pebbles. Its fur coat is very valuable (particularly to the creature itself, which will do anything rather than let go of it). Many articles of expensive clothing, such as wizard's robes, tend to be lined with vermine.

Wow-Wow sauce

A parody of the real world sauce of the same name. The Discworld version was invented by an uncle of Mustrum Ridcully, and its ingredients include asafoetida, scumble, sulphur and saltpetre. It is a highly unstable substance and believed to be responsible (when combined with a charcoal biscuit) for the elder Ridcully's explosive death. (See Black powder for why the combination might be problematic.)