Goo Goo Gai Pan

"Goo Goo Gai Pan" is an episode from the sixteenth season of The Simpsons.

Episode details

Production Number: GABF06
Original Air Date: March 13, 2005
Writer: Lawrence Talbot
Director: Lance Kramer
Couch Gag: The family enters the living room to be surprised by the townspeople, Homer collapses of a supposed heart attack
Guest Voices: Lucy Liu as Madam Wu, Robert Wagner, and David Silverman

Synopsis

Selma gives Mr. Burns his driving test to replace his old license, which expired in 1909. During the test, she experiences a hot flash and is later taken to the hospital. She learns that she is experiencing menopause (which is explained in a video with Robert Wagner). She is saddened that now she can't have children. Patty suggests that she adopt a child. However, after her first choice, one of Cletus' children, is taken back, Selma decides to adopt a child from China. Although her forms are in order, Selma learns that she has to be married to legally get a child. She puts down the only name she can think of: Homer Simpson.

While on the plane to China, Selma informs Homer that he must pretend to be her husband. Shocked, he later decides to do it for Marge. When they arrive, Selma claims that Bart and Lisa are their own children and Marge is their nanny. The Chinese adoption agent, Madam Wu (voiced by Lucy Liu), tells them that they will get a baby in a few days. Homer claims he is a acrobat and is called to perform a stunt when the main performer in a show suffers a "bullet-related death". Homer himself gets severely hurt performing and is treated in a hospital. There, Selma gets her daughter, whom she names Ling. When everyone leaves, Homer and Marge snuggle and are caught by Wu, who takes back Selma's baby.

The Simpsons decide to bring back Ling. At the nursery, they dress Homer up as a Buddha statue. The Chinese guards bring him in, although Homer can hardly keep in the pain they are causing trying to move him. He is able to find Ling and get her out. In Tiananmen Square, they are confronted by Madam Wu and Selma is able to convince her that she should keep Ling. Wu says that she herself had to be raised by her mother, as her father choked to death the day before the Heimlich maneuver was invented. The Simpsons, Selma, and Ling then depart China via junk.

Quotes

• Wagner: Let's give menopause a round of "meno-plause". "Meno-plause"? I'm not saying that!

• Chinese sign: "Tiananmen Square. On this site in 1989, nothing happened."

• Fake Bart: Feast on my shorts, stupid father man!

• Fake Bart: Don't have a cattle!

• Chinese Adoption Agent: The Chinese Government only allows wholesome married couples to adopt. No hen without cock. I apologize if that is a double entendre in your language. It is not in ours.

• Old Chinese Man: (Upon learning the acrobats won't perform) Now we will question everything! How come Pearl Jam never play here?

External links

• Moo Goo Gai Pan "A popular restaurant dish, Moo Goo Gai Pan means 'fresh mushrooms with sliced chicken.' "
• Goo Goo Gai Pan "Recipe uses baby in place of chicken."